Sniff a Poo Baby Shower Game

"Whoo Hoo!  I'ma gonna go to a party!  I'ma hopin' to sniff me some poop!!"

So ring out women's squeals across America as they prepare to go to baby showers, hoping against hope that the hostess will have soiled diapers for them to laughingly play with in "The Diaper Game".

Allow me to explain.

First, the hostess gets a bunch of diapers and a variety of chocolate candy bars.  

She then melts said candy bars (separately) and aggressively smears the diapers with the newly created poop facsimiles.

Women will then line up eagerly to shove their fingers, noses, and/or tongues into the faux fecal matter and with raucous joy place their bets. 

Is diaper #3 housing Baby Ruth or perhaps Almond Joy?  Or is it maybe a game of Poop Roulette with The Real Thing in diaper #5?

Whoo. Hoo.

Afraid you won't purchase all the right items for this complex and exciting game?  Heck, you can buy it in a kit right HERE   

Mmmmmmmyummy!

Git Along, Li'l Baby

Well buff my belt buckle and call me Suzy, these here cowboy boots complete with spurs are just what every 0 - 6 month old child needs!  So cute!  So cuddly! So darned "heelarious".

And if you want your little darling to get a jump on the others when it comes to learning all about debt and handling money, look at this adorable little way of cutting her teeth in the credit card industry!

Both of these fine items and more can be found at HEELARIOUS , home of the original baby high heels.

That's One Hot Baby!

Sometimes when that little new person is not feeling well, Mom and Dad just don't want to have to hold the baby, or kiss the baby's forehead to test for a fever.  Let's face it, hot babies can be icky.

Now Mom and Dad can glance from across the room and SEE whether or not junior has a fever, just by looking at the color of the jammies:  if the jammies are white, that baby is a-toastin'.  If the jammies have some color, that baby ain't a-roastin'!

Hot baby,as seen by white (alt hint: the look of distress and sound of crying)

Cool baby, all pink (alt hint: the happy baby face and laughter)

No more interrupting reality tv shows, computer games, or texting to check on the tot.  Just sit back, relax, and know that unless the suit's white, that baby's all right.

The thermal suit is from the company BabyGlow , which is currently sold out.
However, this same item can be purchased from Thinkgeek.com as long as you are willing to refer to it by the more geeky "bodysuit" instead of "pajamas".  Geeky Bodysuit

Poo Flinging Fun!

Ever wonder what's at the end of the rainbow?  Wonder no more:  it's Pee and Poo!

These lovable, cuddly piles of excrement will work their way into your little one's heart faster than you can say "diaper change".  Along with snuggling up to a pile of poo or a drip of pee, you and your whole family can purchase pee covered socks or even excrement themed stationery!  

Pee and poo plush buddies can be yours ... if you are willing to go to Sweden.  Sadly, this wonder toy is not yet available in the states.  Poop.

Dangling Daphne and Hanging Harry! The Baby Keeper!

How many times has a young mother been out at the mall and needed to go to the bathroom, yet ended up "holding it" because that darned baby makes going to the public restrooms ridiculously difficult?  That's right - approximately 2.38 million bazillion times.

Never fear!  The Baby Keeper is here!

Now mothers with full bladders can simply hang their babies (6 - 18 months) from the bathroom stall door and take care of business while the peanut gallery watches!  

Moms can EVEN dangle baby from the shorter stall walls when washing up after doing their business!

Life in a public restroom has never been so easy!  Buy one HERE today!

It's Not a Bucket

It's not a bucket.  It may look like a bucket.  It may hold water like a bucket.  It may require a drowning warning like a bucket.  But it is not a bucket -- they even have a whole page dedicated to comparing this "Tummy Tub" to a bucket.  So stop your silly thinking.  This is an elite bathing system.

After reviewing the proof that this is not a bucket, you may purchase one for only $42 .  See link below.

Proof that this bucket is not a bucket

No More Schtinky Baby!

Tired of your baby smelling like...well...a baby?   Have no fear!  There is a WIDE selection of colognes and perfumes for you to slather on your little baby & get rid of that New Human smell.

Dolce and Gabbana will be launching their scent very soon.  If you need to control that baby stench quickly, never fear - Chic Baby is here already!

Vomit Chic

Morning sickness got you down?  Tired of having to throw up in non-chic and inexpensive receptacles?
Have no fear --  the Morning Chicness bag is here!
No really.

It's here.

Right.........................there:

Buy a pack of 10 for only $7.50 plus shipping and handling!  That's nothing to spit at!

Stylish Barf Bags!

For Your Snotty Baby

Darn those stuffy noses!  Using those old blue bulb aspirators is so 1990.  Give your child personal attention, by personally sucking the snot out of his or her nose!  The NoseFrida Snot Sucker can be yours for only $15 ---  hurry!  Order one TODAY!

Plastic Mini Caucasian Baby Favors

What better baby shower party favor IS there?   I'm thinking they'd be awesome in a jello mold. The jello could be the placenta.  Mmmmm!

I KNOW you just NEED to have these -- you can buy some for yourself right HERE

The Centerpiece of All Centerpieces

For the baby shower... how about a terrifying monkey head made out of fruit?